Weeds! Why are there so many weeds!

That’s the wren singing – such a happy, beautiful song.

Crispy shrimp tacos – mmmmm.

Seriously. Where did all these weeds come from?

Ack! Slippery! Don’t fall!

Oh, delphiniums, you are so beautiful. Let’s get you propped up again after all that stupid rain.

Cockroaches and weeds, that’s all that will be left after the apocalypse.

Don’t forget to buy chocolate at Target. (Like that would ever happen)

DAMN! That Japanese beetles are back! [insert colorful cursing] Kill two with my bare hands.

OK new tree. Are you dead or are you just suffering a little transplant shock? You’ve certainly had plenty of water. Guess I’ll find out for sure next spring.

Oh no! Where are my pruners! I just set them down a minute ago, where – AH! there they are. Good thing they have red handles.

I wonder when there will be new episodes of Fixer Upper. I really like her decorating style. Rustic but clean. Lots of white.

Mmmm. This corner of the garden is really looking nice.

Those cats better not be throwing up on my new sofa.

Ha! Thought you’d hide under the peony didn’t you, Weed? Got ya!

I wonder how much it would cost to hire someone to clean my house for me? Hmmmm.

Ouch. Damn mosquitoes. [scratching arm]

Stupid mosquitoes. [scratching legs]

OK, enough of this. It’s all yours (for now) mosquitoes! [flee indoors for the evening]

What, you were expecting deep and philosophical?!